January 2016 marked the three year anniversary of the 3 Men, 1 House boys. Check in on how they are doing now!
3 years. I have a difficult time thinking of other polyamorous relationships that I have heard of celebrating a third anniversary. That is much of why this post exists. Polyamory, in my life, has only been used to describe how relationships ended. It has been used to flag the warning sign that a relationship was ending. It is used as a cautionary tale. I don’t doubt the validity of these stories; however, I feel that they are not reflective of the breadth of the story.
Example: You assume Terry’s daughter turned six. You assume Frances’ son turned eleven. It stands out when Connie states her daughter died at seven years old. It stays with you.
So, hidden world of polyamory aside, here are how we are doing:
Charles is on a path of self-discovery. Adjusting to life as a full-time employee, Charles is staring down the barrel of turning 25. Over the past three years, he has walked towards healing. While that journey may not have always been filled with sunny skies, gazing into the mirror of truth rarely is.
Edward is on another sort of journey, deepening the unending waters of knowledge through formal (and informal) education. This has brought much enjoyed topics of discussion into the house that has benefitted everyone. Over the past three years, he has marched through the fire of discovering where his passion lies.
Paul (hey, that’s me!), has experienced and interesting spiral of employment over the past three years that come full circle. He has been pulled in many directions, enough that other interests had to be sacrificed for the greater good. He’s currently reorganizing the mosaic of his life with a greater focus on holism. Accepting which parts that new whole is agonizing.
As a unit, life has become fairly routine. This may sound like a terrible paradigm if you are under the impression that polyamorous lives are like an episode of Polyamorous: Married and Dating. In reality, it means that our lives function well together. We know what to expect from each other, and how to support each other. We may not all agree on where things belong, but we know where to look based on who cleaned last.
We would love to hear from other polyamorous people!